My All Time Most Popular Post: The Fifteen Greatest Roman Generals

 This post went up years ago and it still gets a couple of dozen hits per month, it almost never leaves the "most popular" list in stats.  It draws the most spam too, by far. 

(Start)

Don’t take my word for it. I got these names from a book by a real historian, I forget his name right now, the book is nine time zones away. In roughly chronological order:

1. Quintus Fabius Maximus (“Cunctator”) 217 B.C. “The Delayer;” the shield of Rome.

2. Marcus Claudius Marcellus. The sword of Rome; killed Britomarus in individual combat; started turning the tide against Hannibal.

3. Publius Cornelius Scipio Africanus. 209 B.C. Captured New Carthage; defeated Hasdrubal at Ilipa; ended Second Punic War.

4. Lucius Aemilius Paullus. 170 B.C. Conquered Macedonia; battle of Phdna; defeated Antiochus the Great and Perseus.

5. Publius Cornelius Scipio Aemilianus Africanus Numantinus. 140 B.C. Careful preparation, close supervision and controlled boldness; ended Third Punic War.

6. Caius Marius. 110 B.C. Defeated Germanic tribes the Chimbri, Teutones and Ambrones; reformed the army.

7. Quintus Sertorius. Noted for speed, secrecy and misdirection; Civil Wars.

8. Cnaeus Pompeius Magnus. Young, rich and unconventional; Civil War v. Sertorius; defeated Mediterranean pirates.

9. Caius Julius Ceasar. Aggressive and flexible; battle of Alesia v. Vercingatorix in Gaul; Civil War.

10. Claudius Germanicus Caesar. Adopted son of Tiberius; biological son of Drusus.

11. Cnaeus Domitius Corbulo. Reformed the Roman army to become the new Imperial army; fought in Germany and Armenia.

12. Titus Flavius Sabinus Vespasianus. 70 A.D. Son of Vespasian; siege of Jerusalem.

13. Marcus Ulpius Traianus “Trajan.” 103 A.D. Dacian wars.

14. Julian the Apostate. 356 A.D. Tough wins against Germanic tribes invading Gaul.

15. Belisarius. 550 A.D. Wars against Persia; created a “Medieval army” for Rome.


If I commanded a battle fleet in outer space, I’d name the big warships after these guys.

(End)

The spam is funny.  Guys all over eastern Europe feel like anyone who's into Roman generals must need new Uggs boots.  What's the deal though?  Why so popular?  A fascinating accident of Google prioritization, most likely. 

What Would Al Gore Have Done?

I do love the comments on the "Right Wing Echo Chamber" web sites.  This one is from Weasel Zippers dot something or other:


"Despite any failures and shortcomings W might have had, can anyone imagine the condition the country would be in if Gore had won in 2000 or Kerry in 2004?

I will always thank him for being the man he is and wish him well wherever his life takes him, thank you Mr. President!"


Can anyone imagine it?  Sure, I can.  Kerry, not so much, on the imagining I mean.  He'd have been sworn-in in January, 2005, and the shit was already in the air, ballistic, and the fan was firmly in place, waiting to receive it.  But Gore?  That would have been a difference that we could have lived with, along with lots of nice people in the sandy countries that were about to die unnecessarily.  How different?  Oh, let me count the ways.  (Hint: taxes; deficits; wars; Supreme Court.) 

But this commenter on the 'Zip, isn't he/she being gracious towards our former president?  That's so nice.  And rare on those sites, grace, I mean.