“Faithless” is a word that I formulated to describe my relationship with the God idea. I was raised in a certain religion, and I received their sacraments on the usual schedule. I attended a grammar school and a high school that were fully committed to brainwashing me into following all of the rules of that religion. I saw around me, and read about, other religions. I noticed the powerful role that religion had had throughout recorded history, almost exclusively negative. The point of “faithlessness” is that none of this ever made any impression on me beyond expanding my understanding of the world. Religion, to me, was just some background noise. None of it seemed to involve me personally. I've never had faith.
One big problem was that I studied my family and noticed my relatives' behavior. There was quite a bit of racism involved, and there was a general lack of compassion for anybody outside of a small circle of family and friends. Our religion, the one that had tried so hard to get its hooks in me, preached a form of death that was temporary, and unimportant. It would be transcended, ultimately, when that particular God declared an end to his earthly experiment and called his people home. Home being heaven, in the direction of up, with all of the details being very sketchy, except that it would be 100% ecstasy all the time just being in God's presence and being able to adore him 24/7. This whole idea was the cornerstone of the religion, it was the number one selling point, and yet my family never acted like it was really a possibility. Whenever someone among the family or friends died, everyone was very sad, said their goodbyes, whether simply or demonstrably, and consigned the loved one to the finality of the grave. They were simply “gone.” So really, even a small child could tell that my family didn't have any faith either.
I have written in these pages about God and faith and religion, and I must admit that I have not always been gentle about it. I realize that I have been inconsiderate of the feelings of others, and please allow me to take this opportunity to apologize. That's an unreserved apology; an unqualified apology. Not some bullshit, “if I have offended anyone...” apology. Being condescending about any of the countless faith communities is wrong. It is a bad thing. I am sorry.
I should also apologize in advance for all of the times that I will violate this apology in the future, because I certainly will. I'm like a bad dog. I have opinions, and it is my nature to express them.
God
Religion is an idea more easily disposed of than the idea of God. Between human speech and the appearance of God, I wonder which came first? The Venus of Willendorf is dated to 25,000 to 30,000 years ago, and the existence in human minds of a fertility cult must precede the creation of this fetish object by many tens of thousands of years. Cave paintings go back further, and they include graffiti in the form of what appears to be the letter “v” split by a vertical line. There is no mistaking the meaning of this symbol, but is there any religious significance? It might be simple pornography.
The appearance of modern humans, homo sapiens, goes back around 300,000 years. Those ancient cousins of ours had brains very similar in size, and perhaps ability, to our own. I believe that these large brains developed to allow their owners to solve more complex problems more quickly. To identify danger early and allow those in danger to escape. To more cleverly identify useful things around them, like what things are good to eat, what can be eaten in emergencies, and what substances are poisonous. To design and create sophisticated, specialized stone tools. To observe the passage of time and the movement of the stars and how they relates to the locations and times for the best hunting opportunities.
A brain like that is liable to run away with itself sometimes, inventing problems to solve. Problems like, “what is this place?” and, “how did it get here?” and “is there an invisible hand at work here?” And, if so, “is the hand attached to a being that we can petition for assistance?” The creation of anthropomorphic, invisible God beings, specific to an important purpose, was inevitable. It was probably well underway before the popularity of farming. There have been tens of thousands of those Gods by now. Let's take a moment of silence to thank those of them who are lost in the mist of time. You were a comfort to our forebearers, and we thank you.
God remains a familiar presence in the lives of much of the world's population. The plural is useful here, in more than one sense of the word. God, as an individual entity, is worshiped in many ways and called by many names. There also remain religions who need many Gods to meet their requirements. This may be a religion with a thousand Gods, each with its own name and attributes, or it may be a religion that leaves the details up to each adherent. That last is a methodology that would be familiar to any Quaker. There are as many ways to commune with God as there are people on the earth. Many people have given up religion without abandoning the idea of a spiritual aspect to life. They may believe in God while declining to be pinned down regarding God's name or nature. Other people militantly take the position that there is no God, PERIOD, FULL STOP.
I think of those last two groups as either Godly atheists, or pure atheists.
The pure atheists claim to have achieved certainty with regard to the absence of God. If there is any hard evidence about the existence, or non-existence, of God, I'd like to see it. I fail to see any evidence either way myself.
That sums up my feelings about God. “I have no fucking idea.” Humans are so arrogant. That scientist, acting like he's got it all worked out, has no idea. He's got a long bullshit story to explain where the universe originated, and how old it is, and what it's all made up of, but it's all guesswork. They haven't even found all of the subatomic particles, much less learned how they all interact. It's all subject to change when the next Issac Newton shows up. In the meantime, our scientists have walls full of mathematics, and multiple Ph.D.s, but it's all a mask to hide their ignorance. That's why they all hang on everything that comes out of the CERN super-collider. They're terrified that it will prove them all wrong.
Do you think that your doctor knows the first thing about your health? All she can tell you for sure is your temperature. You get a “full check up” every year, and by autumn you get stomach pains and, son of a bitch, it's pancreatic cancer and you've got about a year to live. This just happened to a friend of mine. He's in his fifties, so it came as quite a surprise.
The worst of all are the arrogant sons of bitches who pretend to understand the nature of God, who pretend to speak with God, who pretend to know the mind of God. God is nothing if not mysterious. Beware most of all, you false prophets, enriching yourselves at the expense of gullible people who can be fooled by “speaking in tongues,” or “faith healing.” Beware also you meek preachers who “explain” your revealed literature to your flock on Sunday, especially those among you who include politics in your sermons. Preach what your preferred literature says, be humble and unpretentious, and maybe explain the parables. That's it. Pretend to know the mind of God at your peril. To do so is probably an affront to God, and if God exists, you may pay a terrible price for your arrogance.
If there is a God, and I'm not saying that there isn't, It is separated from us humans at a much greater remove than we are separated from a virus. At least we and the virus are both living organisms on the same planet. If God is out there, It's not limited to this universe, or the rather arbitrary rules of this universe. It would more likely be the sum of all of the matter, energy, time, and any other damn thing that has ever existed anywhere, or will ever exist. It certainly wouldn't care about you and me, or even this entire universe. Any “I am who am” God, any supreme creator God, would definitely have bigger fish to fry. God would certainly not concern Itself with whether you have a beard or not, or what you eat, or whether you live or die. Just believing that God loves you might be an affront to God, if God could even stoop to your level and understand you.
That's my take. Live and let live, I always say. Let God be God, and I'll just go on trying to be a decent person, doing as little harm as possible. If I'm wrong, I will pay the price, but I honestly believe that we die just like our first human progenitors died, nameless and alone, just dead and gone. Like dogs die. Like birds die. Everything dies. What's so damn special about us?
In the meantime, do good things, don't do bad things, and try every day to make yourself a better person. That's what the Buddha said, and it's good advice. Usually, it's enough. Buddha was not a God, and neither was Yeshua. Buddha created a philosophy of life; Yeshua practiced Judaism. Neither one ever claimed to be a God. They were teachers, and good ones. If you follow their advice, you'll feel better about yourself.
That's the message.
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