It’s very rare that I have a dream that is coherent
enough to even be considered for meaning, and rarer still that the dream comes
through powerfully, and memorably, enough to be useful. Usually they just seem like the brain is
coasting its way through its normal mechanisms and habitual channels of thought
while throwing out images and sounds that can be almost random.
Some people do seem to get something out of the process
of dreaming. A certain kind of artistic temperament can find even the random
images useful. Several artists that I admire, like William S. Burroughs, for
example, have kept dream diaries and used elements of the dreams in their art.
My general feeling, however, is that it’s best not to put too much stock in
dreams.
Once in a great while, though, once in a great, great while
there comes a dream that really stands up straight and speaks to you clearly. A
dream that presents people from your life in recognizable, natural settings,
speaking in their own natural voices and styles, and saying things that you can
easily imagine them to have actually said. The people in the dream may include
dead people, of course, since there is no impediment to their participation.
This one didn’t feature any dead people, but it was
memorable.
I wrote the notes from this dream at 9:30 p.m. one
night, having had the dream in the middle of the previous night and woken up at
7:00 a.m. that morning.
There was a family gathering of some kind, and the subject
of my deceased father came up. “What would he say,” someone said, “if he were
here?”
“Maybe,” I said, “he would say how glad he was to have
a son who was so kindhearted and considerate, if, that is, he had a team of
specialists with him to assist him, or highly sensitive instruments to interpret
the data.”
The dream was with me throughout the following day. All
through the dream, and in its aftermath, I felt the bitterness caused by my
parents’ treatment and neglect, their quick judgments and their everlasting
disappointments. But I also felt, both in the dream and after it, a certain
diminution in the importance of such resentments. It all made me wonder if
there was a real purpose behind dreaming after all. Maybe, maybe not. It’s
still true that they are usually a waste of time.
1 comment:
Well, that's what I get!
All of this talking about dreams resulted in the single worst nightmare that I've ever had. Bar none! And bear in mind, I've been a nightmare machine for sixty years now. My history of nightmares started before I attended kindergarten. And I remember a lot of them too, from the way back. The first one that is a clear memory is from age four or so.
This dream, nightmare, last night, man, people have killed themselves behind less than this. Wish me luck!!!
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