If it was sixty-four degrees outside, it was too hot; my mom’s day was ruined. If it was sixty degrees, it was too cold; my mom’s day was ruined.
If it was raining, my mom’s day was ruined. If it had snowed overnight, my mom’s day was ruined.
If my mom even thought about cleaning house or cooking dinner, her day was ruined.
If my mom talked with one of the other moms on the phone, and one of their children had achieved some success or other, her day was ruined.
If something prevented my mom from drinking until late in the afternoon, her day was ruined.
If my mom had to get dressed up to do something, her day was ruined. If she had to drive somewhere, or walk somewhere, her day was ruined.
It was easy for my mom’s day to be ruined, and if her day was ruined, then everyone’s day had to be ruined. Everyone in the family anyway, which generally meant my sister and I.
And now we must be bombarded with motherhood memes on social media. Share if mom was your best friend! Unconditional love! Mom helped me so much! Mom enabled my success! Mom encouraged me! I miss my mom in heaven! There’s no end to it.
These brief odes to motherhood are acts of violence to someone like me. Please believe me when I say that I am very happy for all of you lucky ones who were blessed with loving mothers. But please realize, you beloved, that your tender feelings are a great sadness to someone like me. I loved my mom too, but for me, and others, it was a very different experience of motherhood.