10. Old Age: This is where we’re all going, and it might be nice to have a little help when we get there. It’s the ultimate pay-forward experience, generate some good karma. Young people, get on the bandwagon now before it’s too late, or someday there’ll be a guy holding your elbow and taking you out to a snow-drift for a nice nap.
9. Losers: Not just your asshole brother-in-law, I’m talking about a huge group here. Tweekers, gamblers, skylarkers, crackheads, goldbricks, crazies, oxy-morons, the low-functioning. There are entire countries that qualify. We can’t tell them all to sink or swim. Remember, a couple of points of I.Q., move a couple of chromosomes around, that dipshit talking to himself at the bus stop could have been you.
8. Fascism: Where have I heard this one before? Patriotism; racism; nationalism; cultural-elitism; religiosity . . . put it all together, what’s that spell! Trouble.
7. Art: This new digital world has done irrevocable violence to art of many kinds, especially music, photography, and the movies. Only Neil Young and I seem to understand that this is a problem. Can we get the magic back? Someone should give a shit.
6. History: It exists, it can be studied. It’s horrors need not be repeated, not verbatim anyway. There are always new horrors to enjoy! The old stuff keeps coming back around, and doesn’t it seem like it would be so much easier to learn from the mistakes of others? You know, without all of the fires, explosions, suffering, hunger, disease, wandering, destruction, and death, death, death?
5. The Middle Class: In the perfect world of my youth (sarcasm alert!), working people drove Chevy’s, managers drove Buicks, and the rich drove Cadillac’s. They were almost the same car under the skin. The rich had bigger houses, and took better vacations, but most people’s lives were very similar. Medical care was a benefit of working, and care was about the same across the board. Now, working people and managers have Toyotas and Hondas, and the rich have a lavish choice of hugely expensive luxury cars, plus multiple airplanes and helicopters. Better houses? Now the rich have multiple houses, pied a terres, ski-lodges, and a ranch in Wyoming. Could you even spend a hundred million dollars? No, and no one should ever have to figure out how to. That’s what taxes are for.
4. The Other: There’s you, and there’s the rest of us. And we’re not going anywhere, so learn to deal with us, asshole.
3. Hunger: There’s one-point-something billion people out there that are hungry everyday. Someone’s counting, I see it on TV. So someone cares enough to make the ads, but really, very few people seem to give a shit. Remember, though, the world is full of men, women and children who are hungry everyday, and you out there, you little Mister KFC out there in Pleasantville somewhere, morbidly obese, most of your food comes out of their mouths.
2. Women: “Women are the motor of life.” Joseph Goebbels said that, which proves that even the worst people can get some good ideas. Women are our mothers, our solace, our water. What do they get to show for it? Selectively aborted; sent to orphanages; killed for a dowry; stolen as a treasure; used as a commodity in the sex trade; taken for granted in the average marriage. Women deserve more of our consideration, to say the very least.
1. Diversity: America has a large, well educated, very capable workforce; lots of good farmland and strong food-security; and a lavish treasure of natural recourses. All of that is good stuff, but America’s greatest treasure is the diversity of its population. If someone comes here from anywhere in the world, they can become 100% American within a few years. There’s no place else in the world where that can happen. There’s no template at all. Black/Asian; Christian/Muslim; Indian/European; all 100% American, and fast too. This is the greatest advantage that America has in this very competitive, modern world of ours. And yet, people have the nerve to treat it like a problem! I’ve got news for you, 1950 wasn’t as great as you remember it, and one way or the other, it ain’t coming back.